"It Kept His Motor Runnin, But It Never Kept Him Clean"

Hey Marty, I said this
NOT THIS!
Seriously! But in the end you got it right. And that is worth something I suppose, but...LFO? Really? Hahahahahah

And now, for the Marty Casey love for the post. This was taken on my cell phone and it shows precicely why I adore Marty. He is a flailing armed conductor of magic and dreams. behold the wonderment....

Six Promises Made To Marty Casey

In the vein of The Little Mermaid from the perspective of Flounder to Ariel.



1) I promise to follow you around a dark and spooky shark infested ship wreck just so you can bring a bent fork and old pipe to a seagull so he can give you cockamamie answers when you ask him what they are.

2) I promise to practice holding my breath so I don't die when you make me go to the surface

3) although I am just a small little flounder, I promise to search the sea for the gigantic stone statue of your human boyfriend and bring it back to your magical cavern of wonders! (HAHAHAHA Magical cavern of wonders...I am real mature)

4) I promise not to tell your dad about your affinity for all things human, if you promise me that if you find a "Face" from A-Team action figure, you will let me have it, no questions asked.

5) I promise to help you remember all the super difficult "human" words that are too obscure for you to recall. You know, words like street, feet and burn. Strangely enough, you can remember reprimand. You are quite the enigma.

And lastly

6) I promise not to stare too hard at your nether regions when you first get your legs and you are stumbling about without pants on the beach.


Riveting, I know.

Speaking of, the Marty Casey love for the post....What is the opposite of the sea? TREES!!!



(I like Lovehammer's renditions of this song better, but I love love love love Dave Navarro, so this one is for me! Don't be jealous Marty, it's not like I have a Dave Navarro blog, you still win.)

Shared birthday.

A story. Enjoy.

The date was September 26, (ironically the same date that the author of this amazing blog was born. DESTINY!!! hahaha)Marty Casey's 87th birthday. The busty nurse who was in charge of his daily sponge bath was actually some what gentle on him today.

"Mr. Casey, today is your eighty seventh birthday, isn't that amazing! The staff here at Wayward Son nursing home are throwing a birthday party for all the residents who have birthdays in September! After we are done getting you all cleaned up, I am gonna wheel you down to the activity room for the party." she said as she lathers up the sterile white wash cloth with the warm vanilla scented soap that his son leaves wit them every month. As she brushes his freshly dyed blond shaggy hair, she asks, "Mr. Casey, do you want to go for a smokier effect for your eye makeup today? It is your birthday."

"That would be great, I want to look my best." Marty said, trying not to be obvious as he watched how the nurses gigantic breasts swayed back and forth in front of his face as she applied his foundation.

"Your son and family will be by in about an hour. He dropped this outfit off for you, saying that you talked about wearing it on your birthday," she says as she shows Marty Casey the outfit.

"It, it, it's my old outfit!" Marty says, fighting back tears as gazes upon the freshly pressed black and red pin striped pants, black long sleeved button down shirt, silver vest and red tie.

"Oh, geez, it looks like your son gave you a choice, he included a second tie. This one is red, white and black striped. Oh and here is a studded belt and a zebra scarf. This looks really really expensive, the kind of scarf that one might give to a person who writes a flattering blog about them (wink wink nudge nudge) He really thinks of everything."

"The other tie, I wear that in the back left belt loops on my pants. And yes, he does think of everything. He is an a amazing boy."

"You can say that again. You should be proud!"

"I am, truly. Now, off to that party! Onward!" he says as he climbs into his wheelchair.

When they reached the activity room, they were greeted with a rainbow of balloons on the walls, tinsel covered tables and streamers hanging from the ceiling. A large LCD screen flashed HAPPY BIRTHDAY! There were about 7 people in wheel chairs and about 10 people sitting at sporadic tables throughout the room. Marty glanced around the room and saw a woman surrounded by two young children and a younger man in his mid forties and a very dapper older man who looked about 70. The lady in the chair had a sort of glazed over expression and the youngest of the children was snuggled up in the chair with her. The family seemed very close and Marty guessed that it two was her birthday from the balloons tied to the back of her chair and the crays paper crown on her head. The young man looked strangely familiar to Marty, as if he had seen him somewhere before. His nurse dropped him off at a table, gave him a noise maker and a glass of sparkling white grape juice in a plastic champagne glass.

Marty could not shake the thought that he knew the man from somewhere. He looked over again and realized that the man was walking over to him. He sat up as straight as he could and smiled sheepishly at him as he approached. "Hello." he says.

"Hi, this may seem like a strange question, but would your name happen to be Marty Casey?"

"Yes, in fact it is. How did you know that? Let me guess, your parents were fans! How wonderful.

"Ha! You could say that my mom was a bit of a fan."

"Aw, that is really nice. I love to know that my music touches people's lives. But I can't seem to shake the feeling that I know you from some where. That probably sounds strange."

"I get that a lot. People say I look exactly like my father, he is the man standing over there, holding my mother's hand."

"I didn't catch your name. You already know mine is Marty. What was yours?"

"Zac Efron Junior."

"Your father is Zac Efron?"

"Yes, Zac Efron is my father. The same one who was named world's best looking person of the century. That never gets old, because like I told you, I get told I look like him. But I have always been more proud to have my mother, it is her birthday today too."

"Wow! That is pretty incredible. So Vanessa Hudgens and I share a birthday? I never knew that. Small world. I used to know all the words to all the songs from High School Musical. Don't tell anyone. I have never even told my band or anyone about that. Christ that seems like forever ago. So That is Vanessa Hudgens over there? I love that Gabrielle and Troy got married and had babies. Disney sure knows how to write the future huh?"

"Um, my mother is not Vanessa Hudgens. My mother is far more well known. She has 100 best selling novels, 10 tony award winning plays, 5 academy awards, a Grammy for spoken word, thirteen golden globes, a Nobel prize and an honory doctorate from Harvard"

"WOW! You have me at the edge of my seat. I guess I have been out of the loop. I should have paid more attention to the news. What is your mother's name?"

"Sarah Hitt Efron."

"Sarah Hitt?"

"yes."

"Your mother is Sarah Hitt? Sarah Hitt? The Girl Who Faked It Sarah Hitt? And she married Zac Efron? How come I didn't know any of this. With that level of fame you would think I would have heard something about this before. That kind of success doesn't go un noticed nor does it happen over night."

"Yes, and together they had me and my sister Zangelina Eflie. They really loved the Jolie-Pitt family. You see, my mother goes by a fake name when she writes, I am not really sure why. You may know her has Alanis Spacey Casey."

"HOLY SHIT! I always thought that was a fake name, I mean it was always too strange. I have to be honest Zac Efron Jr. I am kinda taken aback by all of this."

"I kinda thought you would be, that is why I came over here. My mother always speaks so fondly of you. I want to ask you Marty, if you would come over and say hello to my mother? You see, she always said that she has something very important she needs to say to you, and well, since you are here, will you go talk to her?"

"Of course, anything for the girl who faked it."

"I need to warn you, my mom is really frail. She is in her eighties after all and she doesn't talk much anymore." and with that, Zac Efron Jr. wheeled Marty Casey across the activity room of Wayward Son nursing home towards Sarah Hitt Efron, Zac Efron and their grandchildren. As they approach, Marty noticed the expression on the face of Sarah Hitt Efron was blank and a sadness built in his chest. This was not the vibrant girl he remembered from fifty years ago at Hammerfest 2010.

"Dad, this is Marty Casey." Zac Efron JR. said to Zac Efron SR. "I brought him over to say hi to Mom."

"It is really nice to finally meet you Marty, after all these years I feel like I know you. My wife always said that you two would meet again some day when you are old, and hey, I am not really that shocked that she is right."

"Oh, ha. Thanks, and can I say that it is really nice to meet you Zac. I was telling your son that, even though nobody knew it at the time, I knew all the words and dance steps to all the songs from High School Musical."

"Dude, seriously? That's kinda gay."

"Is that Marty Casey?" Sarah Hitt Efron uttered from her chair.

"Yes, baby, Marty lives here too." Zac Efron answered his wife. "Zac jr. brought him over so you can talk to him. Zac." he said motioning him to place Marty Casey's wheelchair next to his wife.

"Marty, I have waited 50 years to say this to you..." Sarah uttered softly leaning closer so her face was inches away from that of Marty Casey.

"Yes?" Marty managed, anxious and nervous as to what she was going to utter. He did notice that she was making the confused face that she had always given him and the discovery reminded him of how strange he found her.

"It is time. Marty. After all these years, it is time."

"Time for what?" Marty's heart was pounding, he feared his old ticker wouldn't be able to take it.

"It is time for a dance off" and with that, Sarah nudge her grandchild off her lap, removed the afghan blanket from her legs, took her salt and pepper hair out of the pony tail and swung her head slowly yet confidently from side to side making her hair wild. "Bea Arthur, will you help Grandma and lift her foot peddles for her?" she says to her older granddaughter.

"Sarah, woah, your granddaughter's name is Bea Arthur Efron? Never mind that, you can't be serious, we are in our eighties and in our nursing home." Marty said, completely terrified at the prospect of having to stand, let alone dance in the outfit he was wearing.

"Sweetie, I don't think you should be pushing yourself, I mean you haven't taken a step on your own in the last 2 years." Zac says to his wife.

"Love, I knew that I was getting old, and that if I exerted too much energy, Marty Casey would win this dance off."

"WAIT! I am 87 years old, and this is fucking crazy. There is no way I can do this. Wheel me back to my table. My family is going to be here soon. It was nice to meet you Zac and Zac Jr. And Sarah, again, a pleasure. Happy Birthday."

"HIT IT!" Sarah said, and with that, the lights in the activity room go out, disco balls lower slowly from the ceiling and a hidden smoke machine begins pumping smoke. Then it started, the beginning to Ratt's Round and Round. Sarah stands up and struts over to Zac Efron and plants a huge wet kiss on him, turns and walks to the front of the room and starts dancing like no woman in her eighties had ever danced before. The other residents and nurses cheering and hooting and hollering while Sarah's body moved around the makeshift dance floor. After the first verse the music stops and all eyes turn to Marty. You could practically hear a pin drop and then something magical happened.

From behind him, his son says, "Wait, Dad. You can't do this. Not with out this." He walks up to his dad and places a fedora with a quail feather on the side on his father's head. "Make us proud Dad" he whispers in Marty's ear, and walks over to where his mother and wife and children stood.

In the silence of the room, Marty Casey rose from his wheelchair, closes his eyes and raises one hand in the air and points two fingers like a gun, "It's on." the music starts and Marty started to dance in the way only he can. Jumping as if on a trampoline, crouching down low and slowly pointing to everyone in the room. Then the signature move, the conducting of the imaginary orchestra. The room went wild.

Not to be out done, Sarah struts over and kicks and spins and throws her long hair around. The two danced and danced until the song concluded. Panting and laughing, their eyes met. Nobody knew what to expect next while these two mega stars stood exhausted in the silence under the disco ball. Then, they both started laughing, turned to look at the stunned crowd, and held each other's hand up and took a bow.

Sarah leaned in and whispered in Marty's ear, "Let's not wait another 50 years to perform together. I still think you are hilarious, even if you aren't trying to be. Happy Birthday Marty." and with that, she hugged him and walked back to her family.

Marty walked to his wife, kissed her and hugged his youngest grandchild. Looked back over at his fellow birthday celebrant and smiled. "Happy Birthday Girl Who Faked It." and sat down and blew out the candle on his chocolate cupcake.

El Fin.

Phew!

And now for the Marty Casey love for the post,
the first words Marty Casey ever said to me were "I heart Zac too" and it was right before I took this picture with him. He made me laugh and it has been all down hill from there.

Six Promises Made To Marty Casey

In the vein of Rocky Horror Picture Show in the voice of Columbia to Frank N. Furter.


(Although this was posted before in a previous blog, here is my rendition of Sweet Transvestite, play it while you read for the proper effect)

1) I promise to love you even though you took my boyfriend MeatLoaf's brain and cut it in half just so you can use it to give life to your "Creature" Rocky.

2) I promise to wax the chest and grease him up for you while you sing about how you need a muscle bound android to fulfil your sexual appetite all the while I stand there with the maid and the handymen (who incidentally are sleeping together, and are brother and sister.)

3) I promise to not be too jealous of the fact that your ass looks much better in black panties and torn fishnets than mine does.

4) I promise to strip Barry Bostwick and Susan Sarandan for you after they come to our castle looking for shelter from the storm and a telephone so they can call about their flat tire that you have caused.

5) I promise to hide my heartache from Susan Sarandan, Barry Bostwick, and Dr. Scott after it is revealed that you not only killed my boyfriend Meatloaf, but you are also slicing him up with an electric knife and serving him to us with baked potatoes and rolls during Rocky's birthday dinner.

6) I promise that when the time finally comes to give you a piece of my mind, I will be wearing a Mickey Mouse ears hat, high heels, and a pair of old men's pajamas with strategically placed holes so even while I tell you to chose between me and your android, you still get some peek-a-boo time with my boobs.

El Fin

And now....The Marty Casey love for the post. Come on, could this be more perfect? The guyliner, the hair, the almost arrogant confidence in the hand gesture. He is the straight man's Sweet Transvestite! Seksi! My roomie took this picture, leave it to here to have the perfect picture of Marty for this post. Thanks Tiffany

Wrinkled Underpants

And now, for a story.

Wrinkled Underpants- A story of HammerFest 2010.

by Sarah McKeever Hitt

After the show at House Of Blues on February 13th 2010, Marty Casey was taking off his two pairs of socks, when he noticed that something was majorly off with the situation. He had no idea what the issue was, but he could sense deep in his soul that the night's show was lacking his usual magic. He looked over at his band mates, and he might as well have been invisible, since no matter how loud he called out to them, they simply walked out of the room with out so much as a glance in his direction.

"Bob, Dino, Bill, Cousin Bill!" he urgently shouted "why are you avoiding me? What is going on here? Bobby, is it because you had to see my crack so much tonight? I told you I was sorry, but I can't help the over zealous way that I perform." No reaction came from his fellow LoveHammers."

He followed his band out of the dressing room, took a deep breath and prepared himself for the onslaught of admiration from his lady fans. Down the hall he could hear the voices of the usual cast of characters and he knew that once the band saw how beloved he was amongst these women, they would remember how amazing he is and maybe a little of that would rub off on him. Tonight, he needed that.

Smile on his face, he proceeded out into the lobby of the venue. Marty couldn't believe it. Nobody seemed interested in talking to him. The usual ladies didn't even seem to notice he was there. "Alright the party can start now!" he said loudly and desperately hoping for some sort of response and got none. This night was turning out to be the absolute worst night Marty Casey had seen in the last long while. That was until she showed up.

She had been to other shows before and always had a rather confused look on her face whenever she spoke to him, yet something told him that she may have some sort of answer for him, or at the very least, she would ask him to take a picture with her. She always did that. Marty walked over to where she was standing and smiled real big at the supremely gorgeous, tall, obviously intelligent and hilarious brunette woman with brown eyes. (subtle, I know) "Hey baby, can I just say that I think it is so wonderful that you came out tonight" he blurted out without thinking.

The supermodelesque beautiful, hilarious, intelligent woman looked at him like he was the single most confusing person on the face of the planet. "Ahhh," he thought, "at least this part of tonight is normal, she always looks at me like i have two heads. In fact I would be highly confused if she smiled at me at all." His thoughts were so strong that his head was nodding and he was smiling like the Cheshire Cat in Alice in Wonderland. This made the puzzled look on the face of the radiantly beautiful amazon like woman standing before him even more pronounced.

"Marty, I feel like there is something you should know." the woman said, as she put her hands on his arm.

"What is it? You really liked the show? It was great wasn't it? The way we had those pictures of us from back in the day mixed with the lazar show and the fancy screens in the back that changed color? I particularly found the part when the British girl totally called out her online boyfriend and I had them dance in the background to Trees! This may have been one of the most mother fucking rocking shows we as the Lovehammers had ever done. Bobby's drumming was intense and spot on, Dino's bass playing was out of this world even with being sick, Billy was just about the closest thing to a white Jimi Hendrix as you can get, and of course we have Cousin Bill who is, as you know, quite amazing and fucking hilarious. And do not even get me started on last night's show at Double Door. We tore that shit up! I had to fly away like a bat wearing my long heavy puffy coat, but you understand, it was late and I had to do a trunk show in the early afternoon. But thanks for the compliment, it is always really nice when you support us as much as you do. It really makes all of this worth it."

"Actually, where as all that is true, I really just wanted you to know that your pants are ripped and your entire back side is showing. It was like that the entire show. At first I thought you knew and were just being kinda creepy, but once you started jumping about, and later singing the slower songs, I knew you had no idea. That is why everybody is acting so distant, they are too afraid to tell you. Here, use this." she says, handing him a zebra print hoodie, "It will cover up your wrinkled underpants and it matches that really expensive bamboo scarf that I will never be able to afford perfectly. Now I am gonna go talk to my friend and Cousin Bill. Have a good rest of the night, and it was great seeing you" she says as she walks away. "Oh and don't worry, you can keep the sweatshirt"

"You are so amazing" he whispers as she walks out of earshot. The rest of the night went off with out a hitch and slowly but surely all Marty's minions and even eventually the rest of the band started to come around. As he sang "Mr Brightside" at the afterparty he knew for one brief second, that the song pertained specifically for him.

El Fin

(OK so that was clearly an exaggerated account of events, but what do you expect from someone who goes by the pseudonym "The Girl Who Faked It", the truth?)

And now, for the Marty Casey love for the post...see, some of this actually happened...

Six promises made to Marty Casey

These are six promises made to Marty Casey in the vein of Pretty In Pink from the perspective of Duckie to Andie...


1) I promise to always bust into the record store that you work at and dance to Try a Little Tenderness with more bravado than you have ever seen in your life.

2) I promise to patiently wait and get insulted by Andrew Dice Clay outside the nightclub that I can't get into just so I can see you.

3) I promise to make out with Annie Potts in front of you (after perfecting my technique on watermelons) just to make you jealous.

4)I promise to beat the crap out of James Spader in the hall way of our high school after he insults your honor.

5) I promise to still walk into prom with you after you showed up in that hideous hand made polka dot satiny/1960's taffeta dress with the stupid cut out shoulders and weird choker thing even though I am decked out in my bolo tie, and tuxedo and Duck Man Florsheim shoes.

6) I promise to let you leave me for Andrew Macarthy after an eternity of standing there with you awkwardly in silence while "If You Leave" plays because I mean, it is your loss if you want to choose the guy that hasn't worked since Mannequin over me, Alan Harper on Two And A Half Men.

and now for the Marty Casey love for this post...This weeked was an overload of Marty Casey for me. All I am gonna say about it, is he played this song. (thanks to Dan Delso for posting this.)

Six promises made to Marty Casey in the vein of Titanic.

I watched Titanic last week at my mother's house. It got me thinking. I think it will be fun to make 6 promises to Marty Casey in the vein of a different movie everyday. It is a great idea and it keeps me writing. So here is the first one Marty, and before you ask, all claims and promises I make are genuine and from the heart.


Play this video while you are reading. It helps the effect!
Titanic - My Heart Will Go On
Uploaded by Okdude81. - Explore more music videos.

1) When you gaze up from the third class deck to see me standing above on the first class deck, I promise to give you a "Girls Gone Wild" moment, if the moment calls for one. Because no matter what your friends Fabrizo and the random Irish guy say, I am that type of girl.

2) I will let you teach me how to spit like a man even though we both know I already can and if there was a competition, I would at least get an honorable mention.

3) I promise to not let my oil tycoon fiance subtly take jabs at your whimsical free-spirited starving artist ways while we sit at the table with my hoity toity counterparts.

4) I promise to stand on my tip-toes right after downing a pint of Guiness at the under deck party of people with far less social standing than me.

4) When the time comes for our one and only bout steamy love making , I promise to pick a more spacious place than the back seat of a car in the storage area, I mean we are both quite tall and our legs are real long, making the likelihood of cramping and awkward body shifting too high for my liking.

and most importantly,

6) I promise to change my last name to Casey after you freeze to death in the North Atlantic because I was too lazy to roll my fat ass over so you can share my makeshift raft with me.

and now, for the Marty Casey love for this post...COME ON, he is practically saying that his heart will go and and that he is the king of the world xoxoxo...

It started to go south when

(Ok, I don't really have anything to talk about that goes with that subject line, but doesn't it sound mysterious?)

In the midst of the life changes happening as of the last two days, I have gone through all sorts of emotions, and I have to say that the one that I find myself in the most is dancy. I love to dance, a lot. Not in the "exotic" way, because, let's face it, although there is a demographic for me, I am not really down with that tip. No I mean more in the "white people dancing to gangsta rap booty music" tone. I live in a state of perpetual Yo! MTV raps. Just put me in neon green and black biker shorts and a Just Do It! t-shirt, and I am good to go. I think I may have had about 20 mini dance breaks today, all to the music in my head. I suppose that is the curse of the awesome, we have to do the Roger Rabbit whenever the fates suggest. thank God that in this case, it was all in my bedroom. My roommates probably don't want to see me doing the Running man while wearing my The State tshirt, boxer shorts, Emu boots and zebra snuggie. I mean, I don't even want to see that. I am really sexy.

That is it, I am spent. A long day of moping and unemployment benefit application filling out can really drain you. Thank god I have such amazing support system, I would be a mess with out them.

Here it be, the Marty Casey love of the post....This song is great, I think it fits (partially), Marty, don't change, keep giving me inspiration for this blog. Thanks!!!!(and well, to top it off, it was the song that is featured in my 3rd favorite The State skit, Origami.

good night sexi people!

)

Fuck a whole bunch of you!!!

No...not you.

I got laid off today. Now I am a statistic. But at least I still have my humor and really in these days, that is the most important thing.

I am going to stop blogging for the night, I have margaritas to drink and myself to feel sorry for.

And now, for the Marty Casey love for the day. I am in this picture, and so is Tiffany. This is right while she is saying, "Your boyfriend's junk is in my face" and I am pretending to not look. YAY

Bleh, feh and meh

I am ready for bed. It is a quarter til five. I have nothing worthwhile to discuss. If you want to email me, here is my email.

thegirlwhofakedit@gmail.com

Can I wake up and have the winning lotto numbers? 'K thanks.

I just wanna be in my jammies, slippers, State T-Shirt and snuggie hanging with my roomies. Is that really so much to ask?

You know what else sounds good? A gigantic slab of beef. MMMOOOOOOOOO!!!! (WINK) or shall I say, (WONK) Dumbass.

This post is stupid and I apologize. I blame bovine skanky wonks. And, (ironically) the swine flu.

I love you, forever, kisses.


And now, for the Marty Casey love for the post...
AAAAHHHHH DON'T TOUCH ME!!!!!!!

(I believe this is Cheryl's picture...if it is not, and it is yours, well, then thank you!)

That just my baby daddy!

This is what I picture my baby with Marty Casey to look like.

Plastic, big eyes, red curly hair and in a display box. I mean come on, with parents like us, could it be anything but?

Now it is time to retire for the evening, fear not, for tomorrow shall bring more ridiculousness but for this evening, I must bid you pleasant dreams.

Now, for the Marty Casey love...I like this video, just about as much as I love his flair for accessorizing! You really are a marvel Marty! (And I mean that with minimum sarcasm.) Plus, Bobby drums on his knees a lot.

Here is some truth for you

Most of the time when I am staring off intensely into what appears to be a void and my eyes look really deep in thought and there appears to be something wrong, usually it can simply be attributed to one of two things...

1)I am regretting eating all that dairy
or
2)I am trying to get the annoying song out of my head.

Shit, I wish I was more deep.

And now for the Marty Casey love for the post...I have a feeling he is the same way.

Sometimes I miss her.

This is not the happiest of blogs, and I feel like maybe it is too personal to post here, but sometimes I really miss my Grandmother. She passed 10 years ago and when I have a dream about her, like I did last night, I forget that she is gone and I lose her all over again, either in the dream or when I wake up and I remember.

Now it shouldn't take too much deductive reasoning to figure out that today is not the day to listen to the song that I am posting lyrics to below. I think it odd sometimes when a song matches an event in my life, and this one is very appropriate. Thank you Marty for writing this.

Heavy Crown-

What keeps you hangin' on
When the end is near?
I saw that look in your eyes
You have no fear.
Where do you find the strength
How do you carry on?
Even heroes fall
On a road this long
There will come a day when you will settle down
Rest you head lay down your heavy crown
So, it's easier this way
Walk into the light
It will be ok.
There will come a day
We will reunite
I will make you proud
By the way I live my life
So now it's time for you to pass it down
Rest you head I'll wear your heavy crown.
So, it's easier this way
Walk into the light
it will be oK
And you know
What you mean to me
Our love will never die
You're a part of me
All of this time I saw the truth in your eyes
And now it's that time. Time to let go
Fall upon my knees begin to pray
You slip away
Away

I should say something funny. Um, balls...farts...poop.

Here it is, the Marty Casey love...Now this, is funny!!!! Shameless...which is why I like you so much Marty.

I have changed my mind

I had this whole speech worked out so that I could rally some people for pictures of Marty Casey, but I am really not in the mood. I doubt any of the fans want to give them to me and so I am just gonna save my breath. What I am going to do is offer up an open request to the man himself, I am no photographer and I don't have any vested interest other than taking pictures for this blog, but if you feel up to it Marty Casey, I am requesting you either email me some photos or let me take some of you sometime. (god that sounds creepy. I don't mean it to, I do need pictures for my site however, and I would prefer them to be my own. Think it over, you know how to get a hold of me.)

Moving on...It is fucking cold in the windy city today. my thighs froze walking home and they are just now thawing out 4 hours later. Beautiful. I am gonna stop writing now because I don't have anything I want to talk about, but I will leave you with this thought, more of a word of advice. The internet is supposed to be fun, don't mix it with your politics because really, nobody cares. (this is more directed to Facebook, but I am far too passive aggressive to say anthing there. Maybe people will read this, who knows.)

Ok, I have had enough, going to go and maybe watch some xxx porn.

(NEWS FLASH John Wood just told me my Facebook profile picture (the one above)looks like a messy cumshot, I can't compete with that amount of awesome so I am ending this blog for the night)

And now, for the Marty Casey love, (this picture was taken by cheryl spelts and is on her page. cherylspelts.com) I like because it too reminds me of porn. kinda. And his eyelashes are really really long.

Damn it Janet

I hope to entertain you. But I fear with the "hey I think I am getting a cold" feeling running through my bones, I am not sure that will happen. I am sorry. Forgive me? So now, instead of being creative, I am gonna list things that actually have happened to me that people would think are odd....Here goes, all of these are true

1)Brett Favre almost ran me over when I was waiting at the bus stop.
2)I can make sounds of a sprinkler
3)While working a haunted house I scared a little girl so bad that she literally shit her pants.
4)I used to paint only the index fingernail of my right hand black, because I thought it made a statement. I was 27.
5)I had a pogo ball with a purple ball and zebra base and I am pretty sure it was my favorite thing ever and it has molded every aspect of my life.
6)I farted on a group of girls at a Hanson concert because I didn't like their attitude.
7)One of the Bushwackers (WWF tag team of the 80's) licked my hand at a wrestliing match and made my mom really angry, I was 12.
8)I was stalked on a cruise by an over zealous "Christian single" man who said to me, and I use direct quotes, "I just want one hour alone with you" and later, while I was sitting with my family at dinner, "If you would come see me in Massechusettes, I would pay for your plane ticket and hotel" Totally fucked up my life for a week.
9)I used to have the giant cardboard display from the local video store for the movie Broken Arrow. And I am not even sure why.
10)I went to see the band Flickerstick perform because i watched every episode of Bands on The Run on VH1. I still love them. I voted for them. i was real glad they won.

And speaking of reality tv competitions, (Although I did not vote for him, I was a Mig/Jordis fan...It matters not because I like him now) the Marty Casey love for this post...I think he looks foxy here, and there is what appears to be a dick on the plate.

Night Night
S

Don't be jealous of Zac Efron, at least it isn't that douche from Twilight.

I love Zac Efron. I also love animal crackers, peanut butter and chocolate, My So Called Life and 90's booty music.

In this crazy mind you will find all sorts of thngs you may be suprised to know. Like I was born with six fingers on each hand. I have triple jointed fingers. I am lactose intolerant. All sorts of things that will make you think to yourself, "Gosh, this girl is bizarre." But I ask, am I really? Nope. I am just not good at hiding. I mean, I can't be all that strange, there are grown women obsessed with ficticious bedazzled vampires..

Now I know what you are thinking, "Your shirt proclaims your love for the dude from High School Musical" yeah, so? He is pretty and has good abs. Vampires are fake and will kill you. I win.

Sweet dreams and i hope rhinestone covered Robert Pattinson is no where around because that is the last thing I want biting my neck.

Time to close up shop here, so here it is, the Marty Casey love for this post. I find this appropriate because I know he is jealous of my love for Zac. (I have no idea who took this, but i give full credit to them)

Um, excuse me, I have a question.

How is it possible for two people to miss a song at a concert. There is video evidence of the Lovehammers playing Guns and well, maybe it was the beer and the shots, but neither Tiffany nor I remember them playing Guns. What happened during that song that both of our sub conscious minds decided to block it out. Bizarre. Did we warp to another land? Did we take a walk? Did we take a nap? I am not all too sure that we didn't do any of those things. All I do know is that we didn't see them do that song. Is this some sort of early onset dementia? possible. Maybe it is all the acid I dropped on Haight-Ashbury. Regardless, we don't remember.

And now for the Marty Casey love...I was at this show, same song, and quite honestly I don't remember it then either.

Hey look, it's drag cow.

Sometimes I am stunning. Sometimes. Ok, all the damn time. Go on, pretend you don't think I am fabulous, but I know the truth.

I have decided to change the face of this blog. (literally and figuratively.) If you are looking for personal data about me, you will find none. If you are looking for an ironic account of a girl's infatuation with Marty Casey, you will however find that. This blog is in jest. I hope that comes across. If not, I ask, WHY SO SERIOUS? Good night, I love you.

Sarah.

Now the Marty Love for this post... in a word, bubblegum.

Marty when we get married, can we get married in St. Louis? (part 3...The finale)

Woke up on day three feeling dehydrated and sore throaty. As I mentioned previously, I am not used to being in smokey bars and the second hand chain smoking made my hangover nasty. We layed in our separate queen sized double beds for a good while recalling the events of the previous night and decided before too long that we shouldn't waste our day just sitting there, so we got dressed and headed out hoping once again to find some sort of excitement in the "thriving" city.

First order of business was breakfast. We had Noodles and Co. It was good, although I once again mentioned to Tiffany how spicy my food was. After that we made our way to the Metro Link to head downtown. Now let me tell you about this experience. We walk down these stairs to get to where you buy the tickets. Debated on what fare to buy and decided on the round trip tickets. $4.50 and we waited for the train. By train, I mean two buses on a cable. We nick named this the trus. The Train Bus. It was sad. Very very sad. We take the trus to down town and got off right by the Busch Stadium. The first thing that struck us was that there was no one around. Not even local color such as a bum or a crack head. Nobody. We head over to the courthouse which proved to be very interesting. There is not meant to be sarcasm there, it really was one of the hightlights of the trip. You forget how awful somethings in history were until you see it. I love stuff like that. History is sexy. (wait, that's weird.)

We knew that if we came home from St. Louis the first question after "Why St. Louis?" would be, "Did you go in the arch?" so we headed over there. Wow. What a thrill. We decided not to go up in it (hahhaha go up in it) because for one thing the line was like 2 hours long and another thing, it would involve heights and elevators. Why not just kill me. My two biggest fears. So we took photos and started walking to get some grub.

We find this supermarket. It was like an oasis. We loaded up on healthy foods. ACTUAL food felt wonderful. I discovered that I love Naked Red Machine. We bought our groceries and found a place to sit and eat. It was quite lovely actually to be sitting outside in the sun. It was one of those quiet moments that you feel like God/whichever Deity you worship is with you. I love moments like that.

We look at the clock and realize that since we didn't have tickets to the benefit, we should head over to the venue to pick them up. So it was back to the trus and over to Chefietz Arena. Now this is when things get fun.

After another trus trip we arrive at the closest stop to the arena. Now when I say close, I mean 500 miles away. I have no problem walking. I do it all the time seeing that I live in a city with out a car. This, however seemed daunting. I won't bore you the details of the walk, but I will say this, I am now convinced that there is nobody that actually lives in that city. We didn't come across any people. Anywhere and 2 hours later we arrived at the arena, where there weren't any people either. We went in and bought our tickets, and asked the girl where we can catch a cab to go back to the hotel. She looked at us like we had just asked her the most confusing ridiculous question in the world. After that, we asked where there was a walgreens or target. Again with the look because we told her we wanted to walk. Apparently walking is a foreign concept, I suppose it would be seeing that there are no people in St. Louis.

What follows, is awful. The temperature dropped like 40 degrees and now we are walking down abandoned streets searching for a store to buy make up because we couldn't get back to the hotel. This lasted for about 2 miles until, like a beacon in the storm Tiffany spots a Wal-Greens. I have never been so happy to see anything in my life. We go in, buy some make up and head back.

Now tell me this, why is the walk back so much shorter? It seemed like the walk back took 5 minutes. We get to the show, and they went on first. Tiffany and I had a moment of sheer and utter elation seeing them perform in front of that many people in a place that big. And the quality of the show was superb. It was terrific. Even if Marty didn't take off his shirt, he did the crazy conductor thing. It was excellent. Good JOB!! (that was meant to be capitalized)

A Journey/Styx/Dierks Bentley concert later and the show was over. It was pretty cool to see the Styxx guy. Even if they didn't play Mr. Roboto. As we were leaving, we saw Cousin Bill packing stuff up and we went down to say hello, but he couldn't hear us, so we decided to bolt. We leave and circle the arena about 10 times looking for a cab. On one go round we saw Dierks Bentley walking out and to his van and you know what? He is ugly. Sad to say, but true.

We close out the night by having to call for a cab. It was quite the ordeal to try to tell the dispatcher where we were because we apparently had woken her up and she had never heard of the arena before. 30 minutes later, we are on the road back to the hotel. The night ended and we went to bed. The next morning we checked out and bid the city adieu. We got home at around 10 pm and I vowed that when I go on the road, I am never going to do any shows in St. Louis, at least none where I have to spend the night.

And now for the Marty Casey love for this blog. Awww...all is forgiven.
d

A Request Into The Great Wide Internet

If you happen to be reading this and you have some solo pictures of Marty Casey that you have taken or collected or miraculously came across, I request that you send them to me so I can use them as Marty Casey Love, which I include in every post even if the subject matter is unrelated to him. My email address is psychicdyslexicsm@gmail.com (I will credit you, don't you worry!) I just get sick of googling him, my computer is starting to think I am lame.

XOXOXOXOX

Sarah

And now, for the Marty Casey Love for this post. hahahaha

Marty when we get married, can we get married in St. Louis? (Part 2)

"Clang Clang Clang went the trolley!!"
Oh, the continuation of the St. Louis Story.

After we struck out looking for any sort of anything which resembled civilization in the fair city of St. Louis Missouri, we decide to go back to the hotel and start getting ready for the show. Tiffany jumps in the shower and I go outside for a smoke. (Oh I forgot to mention that it is a bit warmer than Chicago in St. Louis. THE ONLY redeeming factor.) I get back to the room after chain smoking while on the phone with Stephanie and Mimi, and this is what I am greeted with.


We settle in for a minute and watch an episode or two of Mythbusters. It was pretty interesting because they built a lead balloon. It was fascinating. And did I mention the taco bell? SHIT! literally. Anyway...so after very little needed effort, we are ready to hit the thriving nightlife of Saturday night St. Louis. WE get to the venue which is evidently Chuck Berry's restaurant. Now I didn't know that Patrick Fugit was a bar back at Blueberry Hill. Cuz there he was, tatted up schlepping empty dishes. Oh how the mighty fall.

Anyways, I had no idea that there were still places that allowed you to smoke inside. As a smoker, you would think I would be jazzed for such a thing, being used to Chicago and before that Orlando where it is banned. Well, I wasn't. It was a basement venue and to have a enclosed space with a bunch of smoker was just about enough to make me puke. Luckily the beer was cheap and able to take my mind off it. I am not saying I drank too much, although I am not saying I didn't. I decided to take it upon myself to order us our first shot of the night. Lemon drop. Mind you, the bar tender had no idea how to make it, so he gave me two cups filled half way with some strange vodka mixture. I am talking about three finger of liqueur. I think what made it a lemon drop in his mind was the little lemon garnish. Fine with me. As we waited, we had about 6 more rounds of bud light and then we met him. The drunk guy as we call him because we are nothing if not original and creative. Well, drunky evidently bought the Heavy Crown cd and with it came a pair of underpants that had a heart and Lovehammers on the butt. He insisted to us that they were unisex. We assured him they were in fact women's panties but he was insistent. We tried with all our might to get him to put them on over his pants. He told Tiffany that he would buy her the cd so she could have a pair, she politelyish refused. We did convince him to buy us a shot. This time it was gross. It was a shot of cheap ass well tequila. By this time the effects are setting in and my head is swimmy and I start my usual laughing and high fiving and telling people I am drunk. Drunk guy asks if he could take our picture, we said, fine. And what follows is the the one from Tiffany's camera. We dubbed me shiny face. Later Tiffany told me she likes the way I shine on. (I feel like I heard that somewhere else before :))

(ironically "Feel Like Makin' Love is playing right now on my iTunes. Seeing that now is the time I talk about he actual show)

Where do I begin about this show. Oh, the logical place. Marty Casey's outfit. It was his typical fedora, black long sleeve button down shirt, silver vest, red tie, pinstriped pants with a tie on the back belt loops and converse. I tell you what, that man never ceases to amaze me. Anyway, the show was good. Billy sang Bad Luck, Dino gave me bottle nod after I gave him one and of course Bobby was, well...Bobby. I mean, that man plays those drums with such force and conviction that anyone watching, and really paying attention, wouldn't be able to help but think he is something of the Gods. Like Thor himself has made him the honorary God of Thunder or something. The show went on for about 2 hours and they did a great job. Kudos boys. I asked Marty afterwards to play Creep next time and he didn't make me any promises.

By this time I am full swimmy head mode. The show is over and out pops Marty Casey into the see of fans. I wanted a picture so I had to brave the sea of pharmacy bought estrogen to get my chance. I semi embarrass myself

and get an answer to a question from earlier and Tiffany snaps the picture of us. As Marty works his way through the crowd the place clears out and we are left with Cousin Bill and a few others. Now, for those of you who don't know, Cousin Bill is a guitarist with the band and quite honestly one of the funniest guys I have ever met. Tiffany got a picture with him and he told me, "Wait, I have to put on my picture taking face" what happened next makes me really happy because his face is priceless!!!

We laughed with him and these two women for a long while until we were forced to go upstairs. Upon getting upstairs we realize that there is where the lurkers were and Marty was up there with some people. We didn't want to be creepy so we jetted. All in all it was a pretty decent night. I wish there would have been some face time with Bobby/Dino/Billy but hey, this was St. Louis, why not add another fail to the list.

(to be continued

And now, for the Marty Casey Love for tonight. This is the picture I had mentioned before. The color is crazy because the original was darker as you can see.

XOXOX
s.

Marty when we get married, can we get married in St. Louis? (Part 1)

This weekend was quite the adventure. And man, is that an overstatement. What follows is a play by play account of how I saw the events that transpired whilst in the armpit of the Midwest.

Day 1. We left the house at around 515 AM to make our train. Now, since I dyed my hair and cut my bangs and tried to load music on my phone, (all starting at around 1130 the night before)I had roughly 2 hours of sleep. Not a big deal. I have dealt with worse and plus there was a 5 hour train ride ahead, I was golden. We arrive in St. Louis after a pretty uneventful train excursion, hop in a cab and take the scenic route back to MoonRise Hotel. The cab driver drops us off across the street, literally without pulling over. Nice. We lug our shit out of the cab and I realize that the Mt Dew I had in my purse somehow created a three inch in diameter spot in the just to the left of the crotch of my jeans. Nice. So now it looks like I wet my pants due to the uber excitement awaiting me in the hotel. What excitement is that you ask? Oh let me tell you!!! Not only were there the worlds most comfortable beds, (triple sheeted!!! for those who have never heard of this, look into it. It's heavenly) but Marty was doing a trunk show for his jewelry line in our hotel, which was advertise right when we checked in, (see below)



Needless to say, I was not all too keen on walking into that looking like I had wet my pants, and so we went to the room to check it out, and give me an opportunity to blow dry the crotch of my pants. We had some laughs taking pictures (see below)





and I did the all important blow dry and we decided to take a walk and get something to eat. Upon first impression of the fair city, we realized that this was unlike any other place. It was desolate, yet big. We walked down the street and the ONLY place we came upon to eat at was a place called Pam's Chicago Style dogs. By this time we were famished so we went in. First thing I saw was this sign (see below)

Indeed, I am super special.

Any crap, we order our food, and sit down to eat. When finished, we hear something that made us both just about die. "Now I've, had, the time of my life...." instantly up and dancing. Assured that the rest of the trip was going to be super, we left to go say hello to my pretend celebrity rock star boyfriend. (BTW, my pants had by this time dried nicely. Although, due to later conversations with my pretend celebrity rockstar boyfriend, I am pretty sure he reads this and so the trouble I went through to dry my pants, almost seems in vain.) Now, since it really isn't any one's business what the actual conversation betwixt said pretend celebrity rockstar boyfriend consisted of, I will just leave it at he autographed my cd and found out he used to play tennis at Midtown Tennis Club and he has a huge hard on for Hulk Hogan (OK maybe not, but it's funny if you are either TK or MC) There was one moment however that made me wanna die, this little girl runs up and leaps into his arms, it was quite possibly the cutest thing I had ever seen. Awwww, too cute. Anyway, we wanted to leave because it was so warm and we didn't want to be psycho lurkers. I took a picture with him, and we split.

We leave the hotel and head over to Blueberry Hill to get tickets to the show. That was pretty uneventful, (the ticket buying, not the show) but we did notice that someone had been busy plastering all the street signs and electric poles with Lovehammers fliers. It was great! Then began our quest of a liqueur store. Guess what...NONE! We walked and walked and walked some more. We walked until we ended up far away and back again. We asked a couple on the street where the closest place was where we could by some beer. They told us nothing within walking distance. Now, I don't know if I am crazy, but wouldn't you think that there would be SOMETHING within a 3 mile radius that would sell a fucking bottle of wine or a six pack of Bud? Nope. Nothing. This was the first big fail of St. Louis. There were many many more.

(To Be Continued)

and now, for the MC love for the day. Notice how my face looks like I have a mild case of the uglies.
(see below)

Well Jesus H. Christ

My good friend Tiffany purchased this stunning hot pink velvet Jesus for me. I love it. It is everything that is good and right with the world. Maybe if Pat Robertson's Jesus were hot pink and velvet he would be a bit more understanding and righteous. What a dick. (Pat Robertson, not Jesus)

I am going to St. Louis this weekend. It is gonna literally be the time of my life. We are staying in a swanky "boutique" hotel, going to see the LoveHammers and maybe save some pets, all along being totally blitzed out of our minds in the dullest city in America. AWESOME! I really can't wait. It is gonna be TUBULAR!!!

I really oughtta get to bed. Last day of work before said trip and I know it is gonna be a long one. Sleep tight and don't let the bed bugs bite.

And now, for the Marty Casey love, (ok, so it's the whole band, whatevs...I want this waiting for us when we get to the hotel)



xoxoxox
Sarah

It Kills

This post is just going to simply be a picture. The title will make sense.

Is there a bigger Bimbo?-TK

Oh hum. I can't even begin to have anything interesting to say. I could make something up. Ok. I will do that then.

Today I went to the courthouse to officially change my name to Brenda Walsh. When I got there the line was really long for the name change department so I decided to treat myself to the vending machine. I got a bag of Andy's Fries and a a box of Chuckles. I walked over to the cue and got in line. That is when I saw him.

He was beautiful. He had the kind of beauty that made you weep. His eyes sang, his arms were cut and his pants were corduroy. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He turned around, smiled in my direction and began to walk towards me.

"Hello." I managed.
"Hi" he uttered.

The silence that followed was deafening. I filled the quiet with one part chip one part candy until my heart was bursting from my chest. I wanted to say something. Hell, I needed to say something. My mouth opens, vocal cords contract and I am about to tell this beautiful man that I find him beautiful, and out of the sky, I hear it. The most dreaded noise I could have heard at that moment. My number out of the lips of the government employee mocked me, and all I could give was a quick shrug and smile to him. Our eyes did not meet, but I knew he felt it.

I hand over my paperwork, my name change is complete. As I walk by where my dream man stood as he finished his business, my heart shipped a beat. What I heard was a gift. "I want to change my name to Dylan McKay."

Destiny.

(My pretend life is far more interesting than your pretend life)

And speaking of pretend, Now is the time for the Pretend Celebrity Rockstar Boyfriend love of this post. hahahaha...Anyway...

A few things I enjoy

Hi, here is a list of things I enjoy.
-Muppet Babies
-soft sour patch kids
-guys snowboarding
-wooly socks
-cheeseburgers
-snuggling
-music so depressing you laugh at yourself because you are crying
-musicians in brightly colored spandex
-aqua net hair
-rice crispy treats
-sexy gay men
-NSYNC music
-the burst of cold air when you walk into an airconditioned mall on a hot FL day.

That is it for tonight. I am going to go back now to listening/uploading Savage Garden to my iTunes. God speed my little bang buddies!!!

And now, for some Marty Casey Love. (said in Triumph the Insult Comedian Dog voice) "I kill you with my hat and wristbands!"

Bucket list

I think everyone should have a bucketlist. You know, that list of things that you want to do/accomplish before you die. I am not sure how many things are meant to be on said list, but I am going to make mine now.

1)I want to win the lottery. Everything else comes after.

End of list.

Now the Marty Casey love. This picture is down right..(insert adjective)

I am not one to mince words

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

HEY!!! Give me back my pens!!!

Pens. The story of a hoarder.

Monica found herself at a dead end job. Her days were spent servicing the needs of the elite and well to do and she wanted out. A sensible girl by nature, Monica knew that it was only a matter of time before her ship finally came in, or she would marry a Greek scientist. These were the things that kept her going while faced with the mundane and they were enough until today.

The snow outside was falling at astronomical rates and Monica knew that from the moment she got to work until the time she went to bed, all she would hear about is the utter amazement people felt towards the idea of snow falling in Chicago. Her agitation was justified because she had lived there her entire life and so had most of the people who felt the need to complain about it. "What the hell do they think is going to happen? It's fucking Chicago in January!" She proclaimed to herself while listening to random patrons expressing their disbelief.

"Lovely weather we're having, huh?!" an ugly sweaty woman said to her as she handed her her husband's credit card. Monica did not respond to this prying attempt at conversation. You see, Monica is not a fake person and the idea of satisfying the whims of this dried up socialite did not suit her. She just looked down at the computer and finished the transaction. that is when she saw it.

If it were at all possible for an inanimate object to appear magical, this would be the one. The sleek silver tip shone under the florescent ligths and the coup de grace of this object was it's green creature fixed perfectly on the clip. This object was delivered to her as manna from heaven, not wanting anyone to steal it, she immediately put it in her pocket and hoped that no one else noticed.

The day went on and as the minutes ticked on, Monica found herself staring at other pens on the desk. "Oh how sad you are" she said out loud without thinking. Her coworker looked over at her puzzlingly thinking she was referring to him, but that didn't deter Monica. She knew that she had to help them. The black cheap stick pens needed to learn the way and her hidden treasure pen was the answer. As he clocked out for the day, she thought with a certain elation about the 24 pens she carried in her jacket pocket. "Fear not, Actos (the name of the pharmaceutical written on the side) will show you salvation." she said as she started her car and began her drive home.

Monica knew she needed supplies for the ritual that awaits the pens. Since there was no manual on pen liberation, she closed her eyes as she sat in her car outside of Target waiting for answers from the divine. "Bumpit, Mousetrap, duct tape, milk, and towels, really?" she began to question out loud. "Alright, if that is what it takes." she says as she turns off the car and heads into the store.

As if a sign from heaven, she sees that someone had dropped an entire package of multi colored Sharpies. "The sages!" she exclaimed as she crouches down to pick them up. Gingerly, Monica raises the package slowly in the air to study them further. "I know what I must do. This is what you shall become one day," she says as she rubs her pocket which holds the pens.

"HEY, Give me back my pens!!!" a loud booming voice shouts, interrupting her moment of worship.

"What, oh, I am sorry, but these are not just pens," Monica says looking at the man. He is tall, muscular with flowing black hair and olive colored skin. "these are the keys that unlock the potential of the poor pens in my pocket. Actos has sent these to me as a talisman. To take these miraculous tools back would be a crime, and I will not let you do so."

"Look," the man said, pushing his hair out of his face, "I paid 8 bucks for these. Why don't you just go into Target and buy your own?"

"GIVE ME THE TALISMAN!!!! AAAAAHHH!!!" Monica screams, bursting into tears. "You are ruining everything!"

Sensing that Monica is having a major emotional melt down, the stranger puts his arm around her and whispers gently to her, "Look, I am sorry, I didn't realize how much you, um, needed these sharpies. The thing is, I need them too. I am a scientist and I have to make a presentation tomorrow in front of the National Committee for Saving Everyone. But hey, let me walk with you into the store, and I will help you get what you need. These can't be the only Sharpies sent from God?! Right?"

Monica couldn't help but notice how strong this strange man was. He had perfectly sculpted abs and his breath was as sweet as candy. He almost made her forget the task at hand. Snapping back into reality, she says, "That sounds good. I only need five things and I guess you are right, it is more about the act than the actual Sharpie."

They walked, slowly and silently into the store. With hesitation in his voice, the man spoke, "What else are we looking for?" He worried what the answer might be after the erratic behavior.

"Bumpit, Mousetrap, duct tape, milk, and towels."

"OK." he says. Like a lightening bolt, he knew. This was the woman he was meant to walk life's long windy road with. More than that, he began to believe. He believed that she could and would infact transform the pens in her pocket into mystical beings. The concept sent chills up his spine as he unknowingly took her hand and lead her to the health and beauty section. The two proceeded throughout the store gathering the supplies. He wanted to ask her what the ritual consisted of, but did not want to hear the answer, and he wasn't sure why. At the check out Monica realized she had forgotten the milk and the man went to get it. His feet were swift as if floating. His mind was racing with anticipation and excitement. The two checked out and left without saying a word.

"What happens now?" he asks, praying that she doesn't dismiss him.

"Well, I thought I was supposed to do this alone, but now it seems that you are meant to be a big part. I am going to go home and get my house ready for the ceremony. You are welcome to come if you want"

"YES! I mean, sure, I would love to come see this through. I mean, hey, we have come this far." He says trying not to seem too anxious and excited about the prospect of spending the evening with this strange and fascinating girl. "Why don't I drive? That way we can combine our energies and maximize the potential of our power."

"That sounds like an excellent idea." Monica follows the man to his car, a midnight blue Camaro. He opens the door for her and as she turns to get in, he gently kisses her on the forehead without thinking.

"This should be interesting." He smiles and they drive off to what is most definitely going to be the first night of the rest of their lives.

-To Be Continued

And for the Marty Casey love, This picture is ridiculous